Museum on the Mound

Museum on the Mound Money and so much more Admission Free
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Museum Assistant and Super Squirrel’s holiday was at an end. As they staggered off the Isle of Wight ferry and into the ...
30/08/2023

Museum Assistant and Super Squirrel’s holiday was at an end. As they staggered off the Isle of Wight ferry and into the dock at Southampton, Museum Assistant held the warm bag of squirrel sick at arm’s length.

‘Never have developed my sea legs, it’s almost like I’m supposed to be up a tree and not bobbing around on the briny stuff like you make me do’ said the squirrel, with a belch.

‘I just wish you’d used another bag Soops, and not the one with the train tickets back to Edinburgh in it’ moaned Museum Assistant, wondering if they would still go through the barrier in their mushed up state.

‘Never mind that, they’ll be dry by the time I finish my radio show’ announced Super Squirrel.

‘Your what?’

‘I’m doing the lunchtime gig at BBC Radio Solent, it’s a guest slot for the animal listeners on the region. There’s a lot of red squirrels on the Isle of Wight, and as you know, our musical taste is sublime.’

Super Squirrel took out a notepad. On the cover, the word ‘requests’ had been written in crayon.

‘The question is, which 1980s Radio One DJ should I emulate for my broadcast debut?’

Super Squirrel flipped open the pad and showed Museum Assistant a list of names.
‘You can’t have that one.’

‘Oh, right enough’ said Super Squirrel.

‘Or that one’

‘And definitely not that one!’

Super Squirrel took out his crayon and started scoring out names.

‘This one?’

‘I’m pretty sure Beta Max was a recording system, not a DJ Soops’.

Super Squirrel thought very hard.

‘I’ll have to go for my back up plan. I’m going to be Jan Leeming presenting the Eurovision Song Contest in Harrogate in 1982. It’ll be Nicole with A Little Peace before the news and Bardot and One Step Further before the travel report! See you at the station at 3!

Museum Assistant looked at the mushy train tickets. It was hard playing second fiddle to a squirrel sometimes.

Now that the Festival is out of the way, it's on to the next important event in hand- Doors Open Day! We're back this ye...
29/08/2023

Now that the Festival is out of the way, it's on to the next important event in hand- Doors Open Day!
We're back this year with a pop up exhibition. Secrets of our Stores is a chance to see lots of things we normally have hidden away in boxes, for one afternoon only. More details here: https://www.doorsopendays.org.uk/places/edinburgh/museum-on-the-mound/

It's a Monday in August, so we're open today.Not only that, it's a bank holiday, so we're doubly open today.How much mor...
28/08/2023

It's a Monday in August, so we're open today.
Not only that, it's a bank holiday, so we're doubly open today.
How much more open could we be?
Come and pay us a visit for the last Monday opening for ages, 10-5 today!
Here's a picture of the end of Festival fireworks (RIP) that once upon a time was sponsored by Bank of Scotland.

Museum Assistant and Super Squirrel were still on their holidays on the Isle of Wight. ‘It’s a very confusing place, isn...
26/08/2023

Museum Assistant and Super Squirrel were still on their holidays on the Isle of Wight.

‘It’s a very confusing place, isn’t it? There’s no cows in Cowes, and Freshwater is full of seawater?’

‘Wait till I take you to The Needles, Soops, that’ll blow your mind!’ said Museum Assistant languidly.

‘No need to be so sharp about it’ said Super Squirrel, who didn’t like the sound of The Needles at all. It made him think of that time he had to go to the mascot vet when he ripped a seam. He hadn’t enjoyed that much, even less so when they brought out the big thermometer that didn’t go in his mouth. Just then, an enormous building came into sight that made him gasp with wonder.

‘What is this place?’ he asked, with his mouth open so wide that a fly bounced right off his central single tooth.

‘It’s Osborne House, it’s Queen Victoria’s holiday home’ said Museum Assistant, excitedly.

Super Squirrel stopped dead in his tracks, and started to vibrate. Museum Assistant had only ever seen this happen once before, and that was when he’d received a signed photo of his idol, the mighty Olga Korbut. It meant he was almost dangerously excited. Museum Assistant slipped a bunch of tissues on the ground beneath him, just in case he actually exploded.

‘Queen Victoria lives here? The actual Queen Victoria? I once wrote a list of all the best things about Queen Victoria, now I can show her it!’

‘Super Squirrel unfurled a huge and dogeared list from within his suit.

‘Wow, Super Squirrel, this is extensive!’ marvelled Museum Assistant, who had no idea that Super Squirrel even had a passing interest in Queen Victoria until now. They scanned the list for highlights.

‘Sponge, Sandwich, plums?’

‘Victoria’

‘Big head, tiny crown’

‘Massive bloomers too, but shhh…’

‘Her solo work with Dane Bowers? I think that’s Victoria Beckham, Super Squirrel?’

‘Also a Queen, leave her alone’ said the squirrel, defensively.

‘Museum Assistant, do any of the other Spice Girls live here too?’

‘No, Super Squirrel’ said Museum Assistant, with a sigh.

So, what was our  ? You were looking at the Dark horse, the logo of Lloyds Bank. It was originally seen outside the prem...
25/08/2023

So, what was our ? You were looking at the Dark horse, the logo of Lloyds Bank. It was originally seen outside the premises of Humphrey Stokes, a Goldsmith who operated in Lombard Street in London, and was probably part of his family coat of arms. Eventually the building in Lombard Street came into the ownership of Lloyds, and they adopted the horse for themselves in the 1920s.

That's straight from the horse's mouth. ;)

It's another   and there's clearly a tale, sorry, tail, behind this one, but what does it belong to?We'll tell you the a...
25/08/2023

It's another and there's clearly a tale, sorry, tail, behind this one, but what does it belong to?

We'll tell you the answer later!

This week's   is pretty special. You might have seen some low budget shows during this year's   but nothing beats the te...
24/08/2023

This week's is pretty special. You might have seen some low budget shows during this year's but nothing beats the tenacity behind this cast. This is a photo of a production of Macbeth, performed by bankers during the Second World War. The remarkable part is that all the actors were also conscripted soldiers who were interned in a German prisoner of war camp at the time. The costumes for the all-male cast were made from whatever could be salvaged- Lady Macbeth's wig is made from pieces of old rope. One of the men wrote a report on his time in the camp on his return to Britain, which was later published in a Lloyds Bank staff magazine.

We think this is definitely worthy of a five star review, and a standing ovation.

Look at this steampunk work of art! If you've ever considered what's inside a 1950s mechanical calculator, wonder no mor...
23/08/2023

Look at this steampunk work of art! If you've ever considered what's inside a 1950s mechanical calculator, wonder no more. We'll be showing you mysteries like this and much much more on Doors Open Day next month, watch this space for updates!

Museum Assistant had encountered one juggler too many during this year’s Edinburgh Festival. They checked their annual l...
22/08/2023

Museum Assistant had encountered one juggler too many during this year’s Edinburgh Festival. They checked their annual leave, packed away their laptop, and rammed Super Squirrel head first in his plastic bag squirrel carrier.

‘Where are we going?’ said the muffled voice in the bag.

‘Abroad!’ said Museum Assistant angrily. They weren’t actually going abroad, it turned out Museum Assistant’s passport was a bit too old and red to grant them entry to any other nation, but they vowed to go as far away from Edinburgh, and the jugglers, as they possibly could.

The two travelled all day, first by train, then another train, then a ferry which gave Super Squirrel sea sickness.

‘Isn’t being sick strange? I can see macadamia nuts in here and you never buy me those because you say it would casting pearls before swine. I don’t get that either, I’m not a pig and I don’t see any pearls in here either?’

‘Makes a change from carrot’ thought Museum Assistant, who hadn’t thought about the mysteries of squirrel sick before.

They finally disembarked the ferry, and breathed in the fresh, juggler free air. Super Squirrel stopped muttering about swine, put down his sick bag and looked around the great harbour and the boats bobbing around on the Solent.

‘So what flavour of abroad is this?’

‘Isle of Wight, Soops’

Super Squirrel looked confused.

‘I know, you told me we were going to stay with your friend Isla White, but where are we?’

‘We’re on the Isle of Wight Super Squirrel. This is Cowes.’

‘Isla White is a farmer? She has cows? Maybe she has the pearl wearing swines too? I’m glad I’ve saved my sick now, she could probably give it a full analysis.’

Museum Assistant reached into their rucksack and felt something warm. This could be a long week, they thought to themselves.

What are you doing today, going to some shows at the Fringe? Why not break it up with a trip in to see us, we'll be open...
21/08/2023

What are you doing today, going to some shows at the Fringe? Why not break it up with a trip in to see us, we'll be open 10-5 today, being that it's August.
This chap from the Lloyds Bank Amateur Dramatic Society may or may not being taking part in a G&S revival in a tent in the middle of a recycling centre until the end of the month, we couldn't get hold of his agent to find out.

Today, is a very serious day in the calendar. Today, is National Potato Day.This is another excuse to wheel out this pho...
19/08/2023

Today, is a very serious day in the calendar. Today, is National Potato Day.
This is another excuse to wheel out this photo from a Lloyds staff magazine in 1962, of a retired Bank Manager and his big potato.
We can only aspire to be as happy as this man with his enormous spud.
It's also a chance to remind you that we have extended opening hours today, so come and see us from 10am, if you aren't on serious potato business.

We're almost at the end of our summer activities for another year, so it's a good chance to have a look at some of the f...
18/08/2023

We're almost at the end of our summer activities for another year, so it's a good chance to have a look at some of the fabulous work done by our talented visitors! Tomorrow will be your last chance for a while to strike your own coin, so come and see us between 2.30 and 4pm to get busy with the big hammer!

Todays   is a classic of the 80s and 90s- you too could have owned your very own Bank of Scotland Filofax! Do you still ...
17/08/2023

Todays is a classic of the 80s and 90s- you too could have owned your very own Bank of Scotland Filofax! Do you still have one of these kicking about in the back of a drawer?

Super Squirrel was very excited about being on a day trip.‘Glasgow! Home of the unusually confrontational kissing techni...
16/08/2023

Super Squirrel was very excited about being on a day trip.

‘Glasgow! Home of the unusually confrontational kissing technique, and a wireless network that picks up things in a strange accent’ said the squirrel, excitedly.

‘A wireless network? What are you on about?’ asked Museum Assistant.

‘First there was 3G, then 4G, then 5G, in Glasgow they have-‘

‘Oh, Weegee…’ groaned Museum Assistant.

‘It loses signal somewhere around Paisley, it’s peculiar’ mused Super Squirrel.

‘Are you looking forward to going to see the Banksy exhibition Soops? I love the mystery that surrounds him, no one really knows who he is’ marvelled Museum Assistant.

‘Psst’ said a voice in distance.

‘Over here! Super Squirrel, sneak round the back, quickly!’

Museum Assistant and Super Squirrel followed the voice, which led them to another Super Squirrel.

‘Banksy! How the devil are you!’ Said Super Squirrel.

‘Museum Assistant, this is another cousin of mine, Full title Banksy of Scotland’

‘I’m in disguise’ said Banksy, pulling off a Super Squirrel mask, to reveal an identical looking Super Squirrel face.

‘But you’re a…’

‘Squirrel? Yeah, great, isn’t it? No one ever suspects. I can scale walls in seconds, and hide behind the bins whenever someone’s coming.’

‘But how do you hold the spray cans?’ asked Museum Assistant, wondering how on earth they got to be in the position of questioning a soft toy squirrel about graffiti techniques.

‘Trade secret’ said Banksy.

‘He eats crayons then sprays with his scent glands’ whispered Super Squirrel.

‘Got you free passes, nip in and see the show only don’t tell anyone who I am!’ said Banksy, scuttling behind the bins and vanishing from sight.

Sometimes Museum Assistant wondered if their life was one big cheese dream.

It's back to school time for most of the kids in Edinburgh- where does the time go? We have a long established schools p...
15/08/2023

It's back to school time for most of the kids in Edinburgh- where does the time go? We have a long established schools programme for classes who'd like to come to the museum and learn about money, as well as digital sessions available on Teams. If your child's class would like to take part, check our website for more information:
https://museumonthemound.com/learning

Do you require a little Xtra museum visiting time? (See what we did there?) Just a quick reminder that we will be open t...
14/08/2023

Do you require a little Xtra museum visiting time? (See what we did there?) Just a quick reminder that we will be open today 10-5pm for coin striking, activity sheets, and general money stuff.
You might just have as much fun as a dog in a hot air balloon with Alicat, IF THAT'S POSSIBLE.

It was all a blur.Museum Assistant had hardly known where they were all week. It was all Super Squirrel’s fault. ‘Aren’t...
12/08/2023

It was all a blur.

Museum Assistant had hardly known where they were all week. It was all Super Squirrel’s fault.

‘Aren’t you excited that I managed to get hold of so many comp tickets for Fringe shows? I know a man who knows a horse who knows a dog who knows a ferret who knows a squirrel, and he’s been getting me to write reviews for Everyone’s A Critic magazine! I, of course, love everything, but every now and again I’ve been throwing in some of the things you’ve been whispering to me to give it a bit of a spicy edge.’

Super Squirrel thrust a squirrel sized newspaper under Museum Assistant’s nose. They squinted at the tiny print.

‘”Is it nearly over, I need a wee?” Soops! You can’t use that as a review!’ gasped Museum Assistant in horror. They turned the page.

‘”He’s not going to take his clothes off is he? He’s put on a bit since he was on the telly, two stars?” Museum Assistant could feel themselves starting to palpitate.

“I’m pretty sure I could do better than this, and my theatre training consisted a going to a workshop in freshers week where I had to pretend I was turning inside out” No, Super Squirrel! I was just talking to you, this wasn’t for publication!’

Museum Assistant’s blood was beginning to run cold. Just then, they noticed someone pasting a review onto a poster.

‘I had the best sleep I’ve had in ages. ***** (Museum Assistant)’ it read.

Super Squirrel was a blur as Museum Assistant spun him around their head, and let go. A small crowd of people clapped politely.

‘Now that, I would give five stars’ said Museum Assistant.

Did you guess our   earlier? You were looking at the keyboard of a comptometer! Comptometers were mechanical calculators...
11/08/2023

Did you guess our earlier? You were looking at the keyboard of a comptometer! Comptometers were mechanical calculators and invaluable tools in the days before computers. This type of calculator definitely wouldn't fit in your pocket!

It's Friday, it's a mystery how we've made it through the week, so therefore it's appropriate to have a   !What's this o...
11/08/2023

It's Friday, it's a mystery how we've made it through the week, so therefore it's appropriate to have a !

What's this oddity that we're looking at? We'll give you the answer later!

We've got Norma to thank for this week's  - it's amazing what you uncover during a clear out! Fancy indoctrinating your ...
10/08/2023

We've got Norma to thank for this week's - it's amazing what you uncover during a clear out! Fancy indoctrinating your friends into the world of Super Squirrel? We'll give you a pound for that. Does anyone have any memories of actually doing this? I've asked the squirrel, but it seems this falls under customer confidentiality. He's saying nothing.

The Fringe had barely started, and already Museum Assistant was feeling weary. As they walked to work in the early morni...
09/08/2023

The Fringe had barely started, and already Museum Assistant was feeling weary. As they walked to work in the early morning, they made the most of the fact that they could see the pavement in front of them, no one was singing, or juggling, or handing out fliers.

‘It’s the best time of year!’ exclaimed Super Squirrel.

‘I particularly like it because it makes you so grumpy! It’s almost like you don’t want to go to an American High School production of Little Shop of Horrors, or the Oxbridge Footsies hour of amusing tales about gap years. You just don’t know how to enjoy yourself!’

Museum Assistant did know how to enjoy themselves in August. It involved sitting in silence in a darkened room, with a glass of something with ice and a slice of lemon.

Super Squirrel leapt excitedly at the containers of plants which had appeared on the Lawnmarket one night, much to everyone’s confusion.

‘This one is perfect- it’s your very own island you can isolate yourself on! It’s got weird bobbly soil like a big litter tray, and a massive palm tree to climb so you can shout at people to go away. Hey you! Flier man!’

A tired looking performer on the other side of the road glanced up at the screaming squirrel.

‘See that one over there? They think your show’s rubbish, one star, would not recommend to a friend!’

Museum Assistant fled in horror down the nearest close, leaving Super Squirrel up his palm tree.

‘Museum Assistant, can you find out if the BBC is here this year? Tell them I’m ready to do Desert Island Discs. My luxury items are nuts, and Olga Korbut’s leotard. I knew this moment would come!’ he said, with a contented sigh.

Did you know that this month marks the anniversary of the opening of the Bank of Scotland Head Office at the Mound, AKA ...
08/08/2023

Did you know that this month marks the anniversary of the opening of the Bank of Scotland Head Office at the Mound, AKA the home of Museum on the Mound? The building has changed a lot over the years but this is how it looked until the 1860s. Can you spot the differences to the building we know today?

(No prizes for saying Super Squirrel wasn't born yet.)

It's Fringe time again, which means we have extended opening hours! If you need to escape the jugglers and general chaos...
07/08/2023

It's Fringe time again, which means we have extended opening hours! If you need to escape the jugglers and general chaos, we'll be open every Monday 10-5 and Saturday 10-5pm throughout the month. We'll even let you wield a big hammer to get some of that crowd angst out, as long as you promise to only hit coins with it.

Museum Assistant turned on the lights in the museum blearily. They took a sip of their coffee and glanced around the gif...
05/08/2023

Museum Assistant turned on the lights in the museum blearily. They took a sip of their coffee and glanced around the gift shop. They always enjoyed the time before the shop opened and everything was neat as a pin. All the pencils were perfectly aligned, and all the postcards stood neat and straight in their rack. The books were tidy, and the tea towels were moving.

They looked again, and took a deep gulp of coffee. It wasn’t their eyes. The tea towels were definitely moving gently up and down. As they cautiously approached the rack, they became aware of a low buzzing sound. It was the sound of squirrel snores. They whipped the tea towel back, and awoke a startled Super Squirrel.

‘Wo-Olga Korbut! What are you doing? You shouldn’t sneak up on a sleeping squirrel like that, you could have given me a fart attack!’

Museum Assistant was about to correct the squirrel, until a horrible smell met their nose.

‘Soops! What are you doing?’

Super Squirrel looked sheepish.

‘I’m practicing my camping skills in preparation for the Cubs and Beavers coming back after the summer holidays?’

Museum Assistant raised an eyebrow.

‘I’m playing solo hide and seek? I counted to 100 and I still haven’t found me?’

Museum Assistant shook their head.

‘The truth, Super Squirrel.’

Super Squirrel looked at his feet awkwardly.

‘I sublet my bed in your laundry basket for the Festival.’

‘What?’

‘There’s a family of stunt shrews living in there. They’re awful good though, they can do this thing with ten hula hoops at once, it’s amazing!’

‘Super Squirrel! You had no right to sub let the laundry basket, it’s my laundry basket, you just live in it!’

‘You won’t believe what they’re paying though?’

Super Squirrel whispered in Museum Assistant’s ear. They gasped in shock.

‘I’ll bring you some tea, Soops.’

‘Toast too? With the jam with the little bullets in it? I better settle in for the month’ said Super Squirrel, curling up and going back to sleep.

Here's the solution to this week's  - it was a tricky one! You were looking at 'the fish that never swam' from the Glasg...
04/08/2023

Here's the solution to this week's - it was a tricky one! You were looking at 'the fish that never swam' from the Glasgow coat of arms, as featured in turn on the coat of arms of the Union Bank of Scotland. Yes, we were being mean this week! The fish is part of the legend of St Mungo the patron saint of the city of performed several miraculous acts, including one involving removing a ring from the body of a fish. No wonder the fish looks a bit peaky!

We've got a tricky   for you this week. Give yourself a pat on the back if you know the city this is associated with, a ...
04/08/2023

We've got a tricky for you this week. Give yourself a pat on the back if you know the city this is associated with, a round of applause if you know the rhyme, and a full on Mexican Wave if you know where this features in the museum. Go go go! We'll reveal the answer later!

This week's   comes with deep concern for the poor souls who got stuck in mascot suits for hours at the Edinburgh Festiv...
03/08/2023

This week's comes with deep concern for the poor souls who got stuck in mascot suits for hours at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe Cavalcade in 1991. The theme of the float was 'Super Squirrel goes on holiday' though we wouldn't imagine you'd need to go to the Caribbean to experience a heat wave in those things! We may have some of those suits in our stores, we'll follow our noses to find them...

Have you been in to have a one to one with our big hammer yet? Coin striking sessions will be running 2.30-4pm all the w...
02/08/2023

Have you been in to have a one to one with our big hammer yet? Coin striking sessions will be running 2.30-4pm all the way through the school holidays, so come in and get rid of some of that summer stress!

We're kicking off August with some good news- we've just been awarded our level one Dementia Aware self certified accred...
01/08/2023

We're kicking off August with some good news- we've just been awarded our level one Dementia Aware self certified accreditation by Dementia Services Development Centre (DSDC)!
We're making lots of small changes to make the museum as accessible as possible to everyone. If you can think of things that would improve you or someone you care for's time with us, please let us know.

Super Squirrel was singing loudly in the museum garden. The song was vaguely familiar from Museum Assistant’s childhood,...
29/07/2023

Super Squirrel was singing loudly in the museum garden. The song was vaguely familiar from Museum Assistant’s childhood, yet it had somehow gone very wrong.

‘Super lupin nuts are we, we are lupin loopy’ sang the squirrel, yomping through the undergrowth.

Museum Assistant racked their brain to think what the song actually was, and how it could possibly relate to Foxgloves.

‘Super Squirrel, is that Snooker Loopy you’re singing, the 1986 novelty hit by Chas and Dave?’ asked Museum Assistant, who was both horrified and impressed by the nonsense their brain retained.

‘The Super Lupin song by Baz and Maeve, don’t you mean? That’s what it was in my world?’

Super Squirrel held up a battered record cover, featuring two bearded squirrels perched on a pub piano.

‘You’ve clearly heard a terrible cover version, Museum Assistant, who would make up a stupid song about snooker!’

‘Super Squirrel, you made up a song about bits of food caught in the plughole called Sink Soup Saturday?’

‘You were a lonely carrot on Thursday, and now you’re married to a single baked bean, by the weekend your children are gonna be weird but really really orange’ sang the Squirrel, who was very proud of his tribute to food scraps.

‘My lupin song makes perfect sense anyway? Didn’t you know that lupin seeds were eaten by the Incans, and if you’re allergic to peanuts, you’re normally also allergic to lupins?’

Museum Assistant was bewildered by the squirrels knowledge of food history, and allergens.

‘Do you know any other facts about eating flowers, Soops?’

Super Squirrel lent in conspiratorially.

‘I heard a rumour once about sweet peas. Apparently they make your pee-‘

Museum Assistant glowered at Super Squirrel.

‘And I don’t know why you’re lupin at me like that!’ he said huffily.

It was a burden being as knowledgeable as he was, he thought to himself.

Did you figure out our   earlier, or did you need a twit twoo (clue)? Our little owly friend features on Greek Drachm co...
28/07/2023

Did you figure out our earlier, or did you need a twit twoo (clue)?
Our little owly friend features on Greek Drachm coin, which is over two and a half thousand years old. They're looking good for their age!

It Friday, it must be time for our  , and we'll be interested to see if you can guess what this is a detail from? Clue- ...
28/07/2023

It Friday, it must be time for our , and we'll be interested to see if you can guess what this is a detail from?
Clue- it's one of the oldest things in owl, sorry, our collection...

We're going back to summer 1975 for this week's   and the opening of Uberior House, Bank of Scotland's new admin centre ...
27/07/2023

We're going back to summer 1975 for this week's and the opening of Uberior House, Bank of Scotland's new admin centre in Edinburgh's Grassmarket. Amongst the high tech features were modules such as these, based on the German Burolandschaft system that filled the open plan space.
Uberior House is no more, after the opening of the originally named New Uberior House on Earl Grey Street at the beginning of the Millennium. Bonus points if you can tell us what occupies the original Uberior House site today?

Super Squirrel was talking to himself in the mirror. ‘No, you’re the best, no you are, no, really, you are, you are’ he ...
26/07/2023

Super Squirrel was talking to himself in the mirror.

‘No, you’re the best, no you are, no, really, you are, you are’ he said to his reflection.
‘I’ve been reading a book on self- rodsteem- that’s self-esteem for rodents, and it says you should be the president of your own fan club.’

Museum Assistant observed the book. On the cover was the beautifully turned out author, with twinkling eyes and neatly coiffured hair.

‘If you don’t love yourself, how the heck you gonna love someone else’ by ShrewPaul?

‘They’re the Queen of the Shrews, they got the sass’ said the squirrel, with a dramatic finger snap.

It was then that Museum Assistant noticed the lanyard around Super Squirrel’s neck.

‘I’ve made myself president of my fan club, but I’d like you to be secretary, I don’t want to bother having to deal with all the inevitable correspondence. Also, could you be treasurer too? And maybe also the tea lady, and the cleaner, and sometimes I get these lumpy bits stuck under my tail that dry out and-‘

‘Alright Soops, I get it. You want me to do everything I already do, for no pay, and no thanks?’

‘I’ll buy you some gloves for the lumpy round the back stuff?’

Museum Assistant shuddered.

‘It’s been difficult for me these last few years, Museum Assistant. First, I’m retired from the world of banking, then I have to move in with you. And everything’s online these days, I bet no one’s heard of me on Facebook, or Interpol.’

Super Squirrel winked knowingly, breaking the fourth wall yet again.

‘So, how many members do you have in your club?’

‘So far just one, but I’m doing a meet and greet in ten seconds?’

Super Squirrel counted to ten in his head, then looked delighted at the reflection in the mirror.

‘How good to see you! You look fabulous!’ he said exuberantly.

Museum Assistant made a note to go over the concept of self-awareness with Super Squirrel again. It could wait until tomorrow though. This meet and great could go on for hours, they thought to themselves, with a contented stretch.

Our summer activity room is being well used at the moment, and we've had some cracking coin designs. Here's some of our ...
25/07/2023

Our summer activity room is being well used at the moment, and we've had some cracking coin designs. Here's some of our favourites, why not come and get creative!

(Bonus points if you're singing the Tony Hart gallery theme while looking at these.)

☀️

Museum Assistant had taken Super Squirrel out for another walk.‘It’s too hot for this’ said the squirrel, perspiring.‘Yo...
22/07/2023

Museum Assistant had taken Super Squirrel out for another walk.

‘It’s too hot for this’ said the squirrel, perspiring.

‘You won’t let me cast off my cumbersome robe, AND I’m wearing a fur coat even when I’m not in my super suit’, he grumped.

‘It’ll be cooler in the woods, and there’s a stream you can jump in?’

‘Does it have an urban flume? I like those?’

Museum Assistant shuddered at the memory of when Super Squirrel found that sewage outflow pipe. It had taken a week to get rid of the smell.

Super Squirrel scuttled off into the undergrowth, allowing Museum Assistant a few minutes peace and quiet. When they were finally reunited, Museum Assistant found a trail of destruction in the squirrel’s wake.

‘Museum Assistant! How much wood could a squirrelchuck chuck, if a squirrel chuck could chuck wood?’

A branch hit Museum Assistant in the face.

‘That much! That’s how much’ said Super Squirrel smugly.

‘Soops, what on earth?’

I thought I’d try out some new jobs, it’s good to mix things up sometimes. I thought maybe I would make a good beaver? I’ve got the tooth for it? I’ve chopped up all this wood, and now I’m going to make an ‘and blast’ with it!’

‘It’s called a ‘dam’, Super Squirrel?’

‘WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT, MUSEUM ASSISTANT! You told me not to keep saying that word! That’s why I’ve called it an ‘and blast’ because you don’t seem to mind that bit as much as you mind the structures created from sticks, branches and mud to divert rivers by my clever cousins?

‘And there you were thinking this was going to be a satirical comment about the branch network’ said the squirrel, with a knowing wink.

Did you get the answer to our  ? What you had before your very eyes was an extract from the list of Adventurers who inve...
21/07/2023

Did you get the answer to our ? What you had before your very eyes was an extract from the list of Adventurers who invested money in the fledgling Bank of Scotland! When the Bank was founded, 1.2 million pounds Scots was invested in the company, and the more money you invested, the more asterixis could be found by your name, which in turn would mean you could potentially hold different roles in the company. Three asterixis meant you could be Governor!

Any guesses what today's   might be? A big clue is that it's connected with a certain birthday that happened this week.....
21/07/2023

Any guesses what today's might be? A big clue is that it's connected with a certain birthday that happened this week...

Did you know that Monday marked Bank of Scotland's 328th birthday? We pulled out the celebratory stops in 1995 at the 30...
20/07/2023

Did you know that Monday marked Bank of Scotland's 328th birthday? We pulled out the celebratory stops in 1995 at the 300th anniversary, including a range of gifts for staff, both current and retired. Amongst the memorabilia on offer was a commemorative rose bush. Wonder how many of these are still blooming in folk's gardens?

🌹

Super Squirrel was having a party for one.‘Bowl of crisps for me, Now That’s What I Call Music 4 on the turntable, Forev...
19/07/2023

Super Squirrel was having a party for one.

‘Bowl of crisps for me, Now That’s What I Call Music 4 on the turntable, Forever In Electric Dreams cranked up to 11, and the office table extra polished for my best dance moves. This is going to be the best breakfast time party thrown in a Curator’s office since…ever probably!

Museum Assistant struggled to argue with this.

‘I’m still disappointed that there’s nothing formal going on for the bank’s birthday this year though? It’s almost as if 328 isn’t seen as significant date or something?’

‘It’s generally the ones with zeros on the end that are seen as important, Soops’ muttered Museum Assistant into their coffee.

‘Is that why you haven’t had a birthday with a zero at the end for at least 15 years now? You can lie all you like on the boxes on survey forms, but the fact your face looks like an ordinance survey map gives it away?’

Museum Assistant went to give Super Squirrel a special death glare, and suddenly noticed his outfit.

‘Super Squirrel! Is that a special Tercentenary bracelet you’ve got around your head? Where did you get that from?’

‘Big box in the museum store, they’ve got the complete Bank of Scotland birthday party kit in there! I’ve got my twinkly disco headband, my big book of banking facts for the quiz later, AND I even found a portaloo!’

Museum Assistant spotted a jewellery box, which they had no urge to open.

I’ve even made my own disco ball from this cut glass lid off a decanter! Look at it go!’

The stopper wobbled from Super Squirrel’s upheld hand, and hit him on the head.

‘It’s not a party until something bounces off your noggin!’ he slurred.

‘I think you should maybe have a lie down, Super Squirrel’ said Museum Assistant, with concern.

‘You’ll wake me up in time for lunch, won't you? I’ve pre chewed it and left it in the tinkly Tupperware?’

‘Museum Assistant noticed the china trinket box with some yucky matter stuck to the sides. This was going to take a lot of explaining to the Curator.

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Comments

This was my one day of being a model for the 1993 pocket calendar !! 🤩
Do you need an old fashioned scarf ring. We had to buy these separately from the uniform and regretfully, even with this aid, my scarf never looked neat on me!!
Starting off our summer activities with a bang! Coin striking is on every day this week from 2:30pm to 4pm.
Remember this Moira.... Happy Days 😀
"🎶 I'm in the money 🎶"
"In the money!"
"IN THE MONEY " Iona Fiddes
I think he makes a great £20 note 😝💷 We had a fab time on our visit! Thank you ☺️
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