Northampton St. James Space Centre

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Northampton St. James Space Centre Visit the actual giant space rocket thing that will take Northamptonians to the Moon, and leave them
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16/12/2019

BREAKING - HOUSE OF FRASER TO CLOSE MINGO CITY BRANCH

Mingo City, 16 Zargorz. House of Fraser, the beleaguered puny human department store, is to close its only remaining outlet on the planet of Mongo. "Following the glorious Emperor Ming's liquidation of all Mongo citizens over the age of 65, there simply hasn't been a local market for chunky Arran sweaters and tartan shopping trolleys", said Mike Ashley, the new human emperor of House of Fraser, who recently took over after killing the previous emperor in personal combat and consuming his flesh, as is the manner among humans. House of Fraser's Arboria branch closed twelve months ago following a surprise decline in demand for emerald tights and green feathered forage caps. Mingo City pensioner Elsie Wythenshawe, Queen of the Cheetah People, complained: "It's terrible. I used to love their hideous mauve cardigans. The wool used to bring me out in a rash when I were in human form, and the 30% polyester when I were a cheetah. I could complain about me open weeping sores all day long. It were magic."

28/08/2019
28/08/2019
One of the questions the Northampton St. James Space Centre are often asked is - how will Northampton's amazing lunar sp...
27/08/2019

One of the questions the Northampton St. James Space Centre are often asked is - how will Northampton's amazing lunar spaceship Skybuggerer 2 travel from Earth to the Moon. Although the details are classified and far too complex for little minds to grasp, we enclose here a simple infographic.

A great day out for all the family!  Why not visit NORTHAMPTON ST. JAMES SPACE CENTRE, the vanguard of Northampton's spa...
27/08/2019

A great day out for all the family! Why not visit NORTHAMPTON ST. JAMES SPACE CENTRE, the vanguard of Northampton's space programme. Our proud and erect lunar booster 'SKYBUGGERER 2' is ready for launch any day now, and will take three Northamptonians and two monkeys to the moon. Once in space, the monkeys will take command and carry out a number of scientific experiments on the Northamptonians, who will then be humanely killed to ensure they do not mutate and return back to Earth as five hundred foot Northamptonian lizard monsters, clambering up the Gherkin with the words 'OM GOOIN DOWN LONDON TO BREATHE FOIRE ON STUFF, ME DUCK'.

27/08/2019

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Monday 09:00 - 17:00
Tuesday 09:00 - 17:00
Wednesday 09:00 - 17:00
Thursday 09:00 - 17:00
Friday 09:00 - 17:00
Saturday 09:00 - 17:00
Sunday 09:00 - 17:00

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