Reflections on this day by Historic Pullman Foundation volunteer Kathy Lynch.
On this pretty May morning, I stopped and realized it is the first Sunday of May...and I am filled with those mixed emotions we are all finding pop up during this stay at home time.
Normally, this date would have stars and highlights and alarms set at various intervals before 1-ish to remind me that I would have a tour to lead today.
For those who don’t know, for more years than I remember, I have been giving the “First Sunday Tours” for the Historic Pullman Foundation that we run from May through October.
But today, I realize that there are no alarms needed. I did not even have the date flagged on my calendar yet (I usually do this in a harried rush a week or two prior, saying to myself “oh crap, how is it May already??”).
While I am always a bit conflicted at tour time, this time it’s different.
Know that I really enjoy giving tours. I love sharing my crazy range of knowledge about the area, weaving a story about how this piece of history we live in came to be, and continues today. But it is also nerve wracking and draining - like how I imagine it is for folks going on stage, you get horrid stage fright before and then you are ON for 2 hours or so and completely engaged and excited. Then I am drained. So I always know that while I will have the enjoyment, I will be nervous before and drained a while after and it always presents mixed emotions when the day rolls around.
But today, knowing I don’t have a tour today leaves me a bit hollow. I know that I now have a gorgeous free day ahead. I also know the reason why and it leaves me sad, wondering when First Sunday will be back on my calendar. When we started this I did not even consider needing to cancel today. Now I wonder when our visitor center will be open again. When the National Park rangers will be there to greet me. When I will have those nerves and excitement. How will it be different.
Soon, I expect. Maybe June. Or July.
But in the meantime, I will try to enjoy my “free” first Sunday and try to look forward to future Sundays ahead.